Nine Components to Resilience
Throughout your life you will meet many challenges. Whether these challenges are physical, mental or emotional, your ability to handle them will be dictated by how resilient you are.
What is resilience?
Resilience is having the ability to withstand and recover from difficulties.
It’s being able to take a hit from life, pick yourself up and keep moving forward in a positive direction.
True resilience can only be built and tested through stress and adversity.
Your ability to be resilient in the face of life’s difficulties will influence the quality of your life.
Resilience is something that can be taught and built. We all have the ability to be resilient.
Nine Components to Resilience
1) Be open to change
Change is often difficult but it’s a part of life. Your life and the world around you will change and in turn so will your values and priorities. Having the ability to be able to adapt and adjust to different life circumstances is vital.
“When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.”
Viktor Frankl
2) Understanding your thoughts
The more difficult the situation, the more negative, unhelpful and emotional thoughts you will be met with. A resilient person will be able to acknowledge the unhelpful thoughts but be able to change their narrative. They can reframe difficult situations and focus on positive and helpful thoughts and perspectives. They are optimistic but also realistic with their expectations about life and the future.
“We suffer more often in imagination than in reality.”
Seneca
3) Problem solving
A resilient person can think about solutions to a problem rather than ruminate on the problem itself. They can think objectively rather than stay stuck in their subjective emotional perceptions.
“The first step in solving a problem is to recognize that it does exist.”
Zig Ziglar
4) Acceptance
People with resilience are open to the fact that they cannot control everything. They place energy and focus into the areas they can control and influence. They can also accept the uncomfortable emotions that come along with difficult life situations. Accepting challenges rather than wrestling with them means you’ll suffer less.
“Grant me the serenity to accept what I cannot change, the courage to change what I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.”
The Serenity Prayer
5) Positive behaviours and reactions
“One of our greatest freedoms is how we react to things."
The Boy, the Mole, the Fox, and the Horse by Charlie Mackesy.
Resilient people can take positive action in the face of adversity. These actions are based on their values, not their emotions. This might include self-care, seeking positive connections with others or taking an action that leads to positive long-term outcomes for themselves and others.
“Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”
Viktor E. Frankl
6) Meaning and interpretation
How you cope with a stressful and challenging event is dictated by how you view it. Resilient people can take positive meaning from difficult situations. They understand the purpose of the pain and discomfort they are experiencing.
“He who has a why to live for can bear almost any how.”
Friedrich Nietzsche
7) Getting support
Resilient people are strong enough to ask for support. They get help and guidance in the areas they are struggling with. This support might come from their social environment, partner, coach or counsellor. They seek support to help them cope with and manage the situation, rather than look for others to take their problems away.
“’What is the bravest thing you've ever said?’ asked the boy.
'Help,' said the horse.
'Asking for help isn't giving up,' said the horse. 'It's refusing to give up.’”
The Boy, the Mole, the Fox, and the Horse by Charlie Mackesy.
8) Believing in yourself
One reason why you may suffer more in hard times is your belief that you can’t cope. Having the belief in your strength and ability to cope is key for your resilience. The way you view yourself becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.
"Always remember you are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think."
Christopher Robin
9) Open to failure
Resilient people are open to failure. They understand it comes with the territory of going out of their comfort zone and is a part of life. They are open to the lessons from failure and use these lessons to build more wisdom.
“Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.”
Winston Churchill
Life is hard and at times you can feel the weight and pressure of it. All these components will contribute to how resilient you are. They will also help you become anti-fragile, which means you’ll not only be able to survive difficult times but also build strength, greater capacity for stress and be able to thrive.
This final quote fully sums up resilience:
“The world ain’t all sunshine and rainbows. It’s a very mean and nasty place and I don’t care how tough you are it will beat you to your knees and keep you there permanently if you let it. You, me, or nobody is gonna hit as hard as life. But it ain’t about how hard yahit. It’s about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. That’s how winning is done!”
Rocky Balboa
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